Riches Blog

I don’t drink tea outside of my home anymore. A strong statement, yes, but I have my reasons. You see, tea is far too special to be drinking just anywhere. Drink it anywhere and it becomes cheap. You wouldn’t take your Sunday roast dinner—normally eaten pride fully at the family table in the atmosphere such things require—out on a street corner and eat it would you? No way! That’d be unthinkable, and would probably get you a reputation pretty quick, and deservedly so. No, I don’t drink tea outside for one reason (as well as the fact that it deserves to be drunk with respect): the last time I had tea in a café (it was actually a very posh cafe in Chalets val d isere too) I very nearly did my self a misdemeanor. This will be hard to write down, but I will do my best, emotions and all.

I went to a café in town with a friend. My friend said “what you? having, tea?” I laughed. The kind of laugh that says: PEASANT. He stared at me fixedly, clearly insulted and good, he deserved it.

“You’re not a tea snob are you?” he said.

I gave it the contempt it deserved: In other words I made sure my face remained stony and my body-language non-existent.

He said, “Coffee–Then”. The woman behind the counter began her robotic routine.

In that moment something happened. I began to feel sorry for me. This friend, this man I thought I knew inside out–he didn’t understand! I felt I had to speak up. “No”, I said, “I will have tea actually”, I said to the woman. She swore, I think, and proceeded with my order. My friend looked at me through disturbed eyes. Then we sat with our tea and I drank mine and laughed out loud while simultaneously spitting said ‘tea’ out.

“What the hell is this?!” I exclaimed. I really did exclaim it consciously.

“What’s wrong?” asked my nameless friend.

I walked out of the shop and left him to pay the bill. We haven’t spoken since, but what do you expect when you sit with a tea expert and he gets served the world’s worst tea?